Merry Christmas!

Just wanted to share with you a mildly-scary video of singing cats this Christmas morning.

Christmas is the one time of year where we all celebrate our families and our collective health, for in a mere 24 hours most of us are going to be trampled to death by the rush of people running to Future Shop in order to save $24.95 on a bunch of movies that utterly suck, or save $50 on a $2500 computer system. Tragic, tragic deaths. Hilarious, but tragic.

While you're still alive, don't forget to check out Norad Tracks Santa by clicking here.

This space between these two paragraphs seems to be the perfect spot to announce the winner of this week's "Guess The Diagnosis" contest... Amanda Li, with her correct diagnosis of Down Syndrome, wins the first prize! The symptoms given to you included Brushfield Spots in the eyes, as well as a Simian Crease. Approximately 35-78% of infants born with Down Syndrome develop Brushfield Spots, while approximately 48-56% develop a Simian Crease. So again, congrats Amanda! You win... $19. Yay. XD

Also... I'd like to share with you two new ways of gaining access to this site. Apparently typing jasunjumpsfencesjumpjasunjump.blogspot.com, although entirely accurate, takes some time weighing in at 42 characters.
So, now all you have to do is point your browsers to...

• jasunjumpsmanyfences.tk <--- the ideal method
• uhohspaghettios.tk          <--- also useful
  

Merry Christmas!
Onto the video!

Norad Tracks Santa!

Updated locations every 5 minutes, and new videos on the hour. Yay! XD
Click here for a dedicated page.

And It Continues...

WEEK 1/SYMPTOM 2:


Some interesting guesses (it's not because the person was obese!) XD
Good luck!

Something New

This holiday season, I'm going to be trying something other than the make-repetitive-posts-every-few-days thing that I'm used to.

Put simply, it's caused "Guess the Diagnosis!". Yes, I added the '!' to express my sheer excitement for this, for "Guess the Diagnosis" would seem quite mundane. "Guess The Diagnosis," on the other hand, would make it seem as if I am a preschooler who does not know how to properly capitalize titles. I feel that any punctuation other than '!' (including, but not limited to '?', '%' and '\') do not convey the accurate message under these circumstances. So, "Guess the Diagnosis!" it shall remain (until I can think of a better name, at least).

Rules: On the first day of a new competition, I'll post a picture or a description of a symptom from a disease that a patient is suffering from. Each subsequent day, I'll post another picture or description of different symptoms from the same disease until somebody correctly diagnoses the patient. The first person to come up with the correct diagnosis wins the prize.

The Prize: If you get the correct diagnosis from the first picture posted, you win like, say, $20. (I'm going to be running a lot of these, so do you wanna give me some money for this?) For each subsequent symptom that is posted, this value decreases by $1. So, if you guess the correct diagnosis when I post pictures of two different symptoms from the same disease, you win $19. If you guess correctly when I post pictures of six different symptoms, you win $14.

Entrants can only guess the disease once for each new symptom introduced.
Answers should be MSN-ed to me at i.iz.a.cookie@live.ca. If I'm not online, send me a text message with your name and diagnosis, and I'll judge by the time stamp to see who answered first. But if you really don't want to sign on, you can post them as a comment to the related post. But beware, every entrant will be able to see your diagnosis!

So that's pretty much it, check back here for future updates. And onto the first contest...

WEEK 1/SYMPTOM 1:


Guess the Diagnosis!
If nobody correctly guesses the diagnosis, a new symptom will be posted. The correct answer will be given to you when somebody correctly diagnoses this patient.

The Best Christmas Gift

To demonstrate Blogger's new transliteration features, I will be writing the following fascinating story about two burglars who attempt to steal a TV only to realize that it doesn't fit in their car, who then pay a guy $100 to hold the set until they come back with a bigger van in Hindi.

Robert Garrett, 33, एंड Jesse Dyer, 32, वेरे अर्रेस्तेद इन लिंकोलं, नेब., इन नवम्बर एंड चर्गेद विथ बुर्ग्लारी एंड थे थेफ्ट ऑफ़ अ 55-inch colour TV, व्हिच थे हद ताकें तो ठिर कार, ओनली तो रेअलिज़े ठाट आईटी वौल्दं'टी फिट. व्हेन अ नेक्स्ट-दूर नेइघ्बोर स्पोत्तेद थेम, थे त्रिएद तो ब्रिबे हेर फॉर $१००, तो होल्ड थे सेट उन्तिल थे कोउल्ड रिटर्न विथ अ बिग्गेर कार, बुत शे कॉल्ड थे पुलिस. [Lincoln Journal Star, 11-24-08]

Wiimote + TV

The guy in this video is probably the biggest moron on the face of the planet.
Hilarious to watch. Especially in slow motion. Because obviously it has to be in slow motion.

Note: If the "Mama Kills Animals" video is interfering with your audio, just click here.



"Mama!"

Extraterrestrial Life??

So it turns out that our very own Hubble Space Telescope discovered carbon dioxide on a planet that is not Earth.

Yes, that's right. The planet HD189733b is located 65 light-years from Earth and, unfortunately, is too hot to sustain any known life because of its distance to its star, but this method of discovering plants opens doors to the future discovery of life in distant solar systems.

HD189733b... I love the name...

Stay tuned for updates. Seriously, this is kinda remotely interesting in the sense that ET may come true.

Source: abc.net.au

Mama Kills Animals?

I got this email from Peta, which links to this game-parody of Nintendo's hit "Cooking Mama". This game is called "Mama Kills Animals," and it is just so gross.

But I thought, "what the hell?" and decided to put it on here for you to judge.

Hulu Fix

You may recall my rantings questioning why sites such as Hulu and NBC Videos block access to their videos from Canadian viewers. Sure, sure, you can argue that "oh but it's for legal reasons," and yes that does make sense.

But, what is the end result? A bunch of Canadians who can't access Hulu. A bunch of Canadians who can't catch up on that latest episode of Bones the next day while scrambling to finish their English essay at the same time. A bunch of Canadians who can't watch decent television without torrenting the show.

So after searching for a long time (and I mean a long time!) I've stumbled upon a program by the name of HotSpot Shield. This program installs onto your computer and edits your network settings so it runs through a VPN. And, it's easily deactivated: an icon shows up on your taskbar, and with two clicks you can turn HotSpot on and off.

And boy does it work! It's almost as fast as my true internet connection, which means that I can stream an HD Hulu TV Show from the moment the page loads.


And no, this screenshot was not created by me.